While I was walking along the beach this morning, I was mindful of the different shapes and sizes of footprints of others who had gone ahead of me.
I reflected on the fact that the choices we make will heavily impact our footprints on the sands of time.
I recalled walking around the school I taught at one day and stumbling into a conversation between two final year students.
“I only had four hours sleep,” said an animated Jess, “and this is my fourth cup of coffee!”
“Make sure you have nine hours sleep a night throughout the next week,” I interjected. “Your brain needs time to consolidate your learning and to discard what you don’t need to remember.”
“You won’t be able to remember anything if you don’t get your sleep,” level-headed Rory added.
“I have so much to learn!” Jess, looking startled at my suggestion, said.
“How have you done through the semester?” I asked. “Have you been working consistently?”
Jess nodded.
“Then you will be fine,” I reassured her, “but you need your sleep!”
Jess was clearly on a caffeine high at the time, a bubbly personality, yet unable to hide the anxiety. I wondered if she was being placed under pressure to perform by her parents, or by her peers.
“At least you have a good sense of humor,” I smiled.
“Sense of humor?” Jess looked puzzled and smiled. “That is not going to help me pass my exam.”
As I listened to comments like those, I began to appreciate more and more how important it is for parents, students, and teachers to work together to ensure situations like this do not occur.
The effective use of time — Jason’s experience
How many times do you stop each week and wonder where time has disappeared to?
Or mope about saying, “I don’t have enough time,” or “I am too busy!” or words to that effect?
What is causing the increased anxiety we see amongst our young people?
Jason once told me that one of his problems was that he did not finish his assessments on time. This was partly because he worked better in subjects he enjoyed rather than those he either found irrelevant or boring, and partly because he clearly needed guidance with regard to organizing his schedule and managing his time more effectively.
Our conversation ended up exploring hours of sleep (minimum of nine hours every night are suggested by so much research), his personal goals and a breakdown of how he travels through each and every day of the week.
Jason required a healthy and balanced lifestyle to reach his potential.
I stressed to him, by way of encouragement, that he needed a schedule that allowed him social time to be with his peers, or time simply to relax — very important in the life of a teenager.
How well had Jess planned and organized her time? Was she having nine hours sleep a night to allow her brain to process what was and what was not worth storing?
Promoting the spirit of mentoring involves guiding young people on how to plan their days and weeks — the non-judgmental cheerleader — as well as encouraging them to identify different qualities of time, and to adapt their behavior to suit each one.
Three key tips for encouraging teenagers to use time wisely
Jason and I looked at the following three qualities of time:
1. During peak performance hours the brain is functioning at maximum level. Teenagers can focus on the academic areas that require a high level of concentration. For example, they might revise for a test or exam, or work through a tough problem-solving task.
2. Certain times are creative. At such times, encourage teenagers to allow their ideas to flow freely, as they are thinking clearly. They could write or design something, pursue a hobby or read. The key is to stay motivated to study or pursue the development of a life skill.
3. Off-peak hours bring fatigue. These times can be more constructive than many teenagers appreciate. For example, they can use such times to file or write notes, carry out chores or duties at home, or do whatever administrative work they need to do.
We explored different options and then, during the next couple of weeks, Jason started experimenting with his schedule until he found what worked best for him.
Not only did his schedule become a game-changer for him, he also removed some stress from his life, learnt to cope and deal with other challenges and eventually graduated successfully from school and moved on to study his career choice at University.
I was able to tick off some checkpoints to look out for in a young person you are nurturing, as I observed Jason’s progress:
Jason:
- had a greater sense of belonging;
- had a better perspective of himself;
- had a sense of hope for the future;
- developed a stronger sense of self-worth;
- had a feeling of significance.
While one can undertake online courses to learn what one needs to do to improve in some areas, students need the face-to-face relationships with a wise guide on the side — a mentor, a parent, a teacher, a coach — someone they trust to help them develop strategies that will work for them; to talk through frustrations, challenges and other teenage issues.
The spirit of mentoring transforms communities
The spirit of mentoring embraces the heart-to-heart non-judgmental, empathetic volunteer adult reaching into a young person’s life with unconditional care, and either pointing or guiding them in the direction of a positive, yet unknown future and equipping them with the tools to achieve their goals and dreams.
I hope that students like Jess are able to find someone to take on that supportive role so that they can create some wonderful footprints with the gifts and talents they have to offer.
Cover photo by DANNY G on Unsplash
